Are sex, pleasure, and intimacy the elephant in your bedroom?
Are you struggling to shake off a feeling of shame and unease about sex?
Are you worried that this could spell the end for your relationship or marriage?
The Shameless Woman programme is for you.
Welcome to the sex-positive sisterhood you've been waiting for
Where you are now:
If you feel frustrated because you freeze when it comes to sex.
If you feel tired because you flinch every time your partner touches you.
If you are grieving the loss of your sex life after a life transition.
If you are fed up of feeling awkward and unsexy.
If you feel like you’ve done so much of, “the work” in other areas of your life, but feel sexually stuck.
Every time a worried woman approaches me to work together, sends me a DM on social media, or comments, I feel like I have to say the same thing.
You are not sexually broken, the system is.
We need to become Shameless.
I love this word because it sums up much of my own healing path in body, soul, and sex.
I grew up in ‘90s’ and ‘00’s London in a church going family and was immersed in Evangelical Christianity and Purity Culture. It took me a long time- and going to sexology school- to learn how to feel good in my body, embrace my sexuality and pleasure as something GOOD (not sinful or dirty), and feel on a deep level my erotic aliveness.
Becoming a sexually shameless woman was and is my journey to healing.
Sexual shame is something that everybody experiences on some level, and it is woven into the fabric of most societies.
From slut shaming, laws governing reproductive rights, to how women are treated in the media, double standards, gender inequality, sex education in schools, beauty standards, diet culture, right down to where you are today, feeling a gulf between you and your partner, or you and your body.
You can cross your fingers and hope it gets better by itself, but I think you’ve probably tried that already.
Or you can take the next step.
I want to live in a world where we feel no shame in our bodies.
Where pleasure is taught as standard in sexuality education
Where you know on a deep cellular level that your sexuality is yours first.
Where evidence-based and pleasure-focused sexuality education is taught as standard to our young people.
Where you resource yourself first before giving to your partner.
And where women support each other’s sexual and sensual liberation rather than tearing each other down.
My guess is, you want this, too.
The Shameless Woman is an intimate 12-week container for you to remove your sexual blocks, embrace your full pleasure potential, and create even deeper intimacy in your relationship with yourself, and your partner/s, if you have one.
Think of it as the sex and pleasure school you never got to go to, but always wanted.
It will be a small, intimate container of 6 women.
It’s for you if:
You want to step into your sexually, liberated, free, unapologetic, and turned on self
You want to ooze sexual and sensual confidence so you can ask for what you want, and have it
You want to shake off the shackles of being, “the good girl”, and embrace your full orgasmic potential
You passionately believe in equal rights, inclusivity, social justice, and healing AND you want to feel in ease and flow.
You want a better world of equal rights for all, for girls to be empowered, and for women/womxn to step into their power all over the world
You want to dive deep into what it is to be who you really are as a completely free, erotic, sensual, sexual, and fierce being
You want a soulful approach that is also practical and easy to understand
You’ve done your years of therapy, you’ve talked your heart out, you’ve read all the theories but it still hasn’t shifted.
You grew up in a conservative or religious household, community or culture. You were taught that anything to do with sex or your body was somehow, “wrong”, “bad”, or even, “dirty”.
You want to make friends in a supportive and sex-affirming community
You’ve felt overwhelmed in big groups and want more personalized support
This may not be for you if:
You don’t want sex and sexuality to be important
You want a mystical, tantric, shakti temple experience
You want intensive 1:1 attention (if that’s what you’re looking for you can apply to work with me 1:1 here)
You’re not ready to take radical self-responsibility
You just want to learn how to have an orgasm or give a great blow job, but aren’t sure about deeper work yet
You are put off by gender-inclusive terms such as, “vulva owner”, or, “womxn”
How it’s different:
This isn’t just a sex course where you learn the nuts and bolts, how to “spice it up”, or that if you learn this new position, it will solve everything.
It’s the pleasure-focused, soul-led, and embodied sexuality education you needed to be taught in high school, and a new way of being.
It’s not a therapy group.
While you’ll be in community with a small group of women and it will be therapeutic and healing, it is not therapy or a group to only talk about everything that has gone wrong.
You’re here because you’ve done the work in therapy or coaching, and now you’re ready to work with your body. This is fully embodied, fully immersive, and deeply transformational work. You will be working with your mind, body, emotions, energy, and spirit.
It is not a video course where you learn facts, you will be in connection with the others in this container and working in real time.
We’ll be working with body-based, practical, and pleasure-focused tools that you can put into action in your everyday life.
There is no competition for being, “the kinkiest”, the most sexually experienced, or who can make the most orgasmic noises. You do this at your pace, in a way that feels authentic to you.
NO previous experience in tantra or yoga is required, and you don’t need to be any good at dancing. This is about your experience and coming into your body-- and I will encourage you to let it feel silly and ridiculous too.
(Rule of thumb: if it’s making you giggle and it feels good, it’s working!)
Everything will be fully clothed, with the invitation to wear something that makes you feel wonderful. If you would like to explore nudity, this is also warmly welcomed because this will be in the privacy of your own space!
However, due to the restrictions to working online and Zoom, you can either turn off your video or away from the screen.
By the end of this container, this is what you may experience:
Feel able to ask for what you actually want, and receive it
Feel much more confident in your sexual self
Be able to identify and talk about your desires, turn ons and turn off’s
Adore pleasure and self pleasuring
Feel that your eros really is your life-force
Experience more exquisite sensations in your vulva
Know that your pleasure really is your own and not feel pressured to orgasm to please your partner
No longer feel trapped by stories about yourself or experiences from your past
Be able to more confidently express your limits and boundaries
Feel a stronger erotic connection with your partner
Feel a deeper connection between your sexuality, spiritual practice, and soul
Really celebrate and enjoy your delicious body
Feel so much more sexy, more sensual, and more rawr
How it works:
We start May 13th, 2021.
We’ll meet every week on Thursday evenings (UK time) for between 90 minutes to 2 hours on Zoom for a live call. Each call will start with some movement, exercises from tantra and taoism, some teaching, and a chance to connect with the others in the container.
Before you wince and think, “Not another fucking Zoom call HALP!”- it’s not going to be like a work Zoom call. You are invited to take breaks, breathe, move, and take care of your own needs. All calls will be recorded so you can catch up.
There will also be a portal with the class recordings, handouts, and journaling prompts for the week.
We will have a closed Facebook group to share your experiences.
When you enroll, you will be asked to sign a confidentiality agreement so that everybody can feel as safe as possible.
I am a clinical sexologist and sex, intimacy, and relationship coach. My passion and joy is helping women/womxn just like you to embrace your pleasure, release the shackles of shame, and claim your birthright to create the deeply satisfying relationships you desire.
I am regularly quoted in the media, in publications such as Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Tinder Swipe Life, Men’s Health, Shape, Womanizer O Diaries, Kinkly, and Sexual Health Magazine.
I have helped women in many countries around the world to embrace their pleasure and rediscover their joy, vitality, and creativity.
I have numerous trainings under my belt (including a Certified Sex Coach™ and am passionate about continuing my professional development.
More than my training, I am a woman who has walked this path myself and still continues to walk it.
My style is warm and empathic, but also quirky, irreverent with lots
I grew up in the Church and had many years of chronic illness where I had to completely re-learn how to relate to my body, my pleasure, and my sexuality.
Don’t just take my word for it
Working with Lucy was a delight. She was knowledgeable, attentive, and professional. She put everyone instantly at ease and I enjoyed the intelligent way in which the Shameless Woman program was designed and the way in which she intuitively guided and supported us through topics that felt challenging with stillness, movement or fun.
After seeing Lucy, our sex life which had well and truly hit a rut, slowly has started to bloom again.
Increased moments of intimacy and connection led to episodes of foreplay the like of which we hadn't had in years.
And eventually this has led to a renewed sex life and desire for each other.
This in itself has been great, but it is the daily small moments which mean just as much if not more.
The hand holding, the affection and warmth is back in our relationship and I thank you greatly for helping us to find it again!
Julia, EAST SUSSEX
Do I need to be in a relationship or married to take part in this?
No you don’t! Because we’ll be working just on you and your sexuality. This work will enrich your relationship or marriage if you’re in one, and will prepare you for a more fulfilling relationship if you’re currently single. Whether you’re single, dating, in a long term relationship, in an open relationship, poly, or been married for 20 years, you’ll benefit from this.
I’ve done a lot of work in therapy already, will this make any difference?
I don’t make any guarantees, only you know what’s right for you. I know my work is most effective for women who’ve already done work in therapy or coaching, because I know you’ll be more receptive. This will also work for you if you’ve already tried tantra, conscious sexuality, or have engaged in sex therapy or coaching.
What if I feel uncomfortable or weird?
Some of this may be very new to you, some may not be. Part of the work is you learning to voice your boundaries and listen to when something is a hard, “NO”. I will also challenge you to lean into the feelings of discomfort and suspend your judgment from time to time to expand your container. There will be no nudity or physical contact during this program, and everything that happens in the program is confidential. If something is too much for you, please let me know by Facebook PM or an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
How do I pay?
Your payment will be secure via Stripe, I do not receive your bank details. If you select the payment plan option, your bank account will be debited each month.
Can I pay in installments?
Yes! You can choose to pay in 3 monthly installments. You’ll be sent an invoice by Stripe and the money will be taken from your account each month.
Can you guarantee that this will change my life?
I try not to make any guarantees because this is completely down to you. If you do the work, this will change your life. But you need to be pro-active and to do the work, otherwise you won’t see the results you want.
What if I can’t attend the classes live?
It’s ideal if you can attend live, but sometimes you are too tired and need some down time, I get that. All classes will be available as a recording and emailed to you within 48 hours.
I really want to do this, but my life is so busy! How can I make this work?
I hear you. You’ll need to set aside around 2 hours per week for this, plus a morning practice, and extra time for journaling. You will find the time, and find that it is something that adds to your life, not subtracts.
I can’t afford this but I really need this in my life, how can I take part?
I am opening up one space for a scholarship place on this round, and there will be scholarships spaces in future rounds too, email me to apply.
Can I get a refund if I don’t like the program?
There is a 10 day window after you’ve sent your first payment until July 1, but then after that there are no refunds, sorry. I am investing a lot of my time and energy into this program and I expect that once you financially commit, you honour your side of the agreement. If you find that the program is too much for you, I am happy to discuss alternative ways for us to work together to make this more doable for you.